Roxularium - форум, посвящённый Ричарду Роксбургу и фильму Ван Хельсинг

Last year I was a completely different human. Thanks God, I met Richard! I've written tons of letters at almost all forums about RR I've come across on the net. About going mad... I've been mad, insane since I saw Richard as Dracula in Van Helsing. If God sometimes touches us to show there is something more than daily tedious life, it happened to me last May, when I saw Richard's fair face, I coudn't breathe, I was suffocating because such a beauty couldn't exist even in my imagination. The thing that amazes me most is that this love isn't fading, it's exactly the same as it was that first time, and I can't live, can't think, cause Richard has occupied my mind and, what is more, he has changed my life. Actually, last year I got into trouble, I thought I shouldn't live anymore, there was no a slight sense in my life, one day, in despair I went to the cinema having no idea it it's good or not. And fell in love with him after two seconds (enough to perceive an image for a human brain). Summing up, I saw Van Helsing 10 times in the cinema and an endless amount of times on video at home. I consider this as one of the best films ever-excellent cast crew, intriguing plot, divine Dracula, (in fact, the handsomest man in the world). I really can't get tired of watching this, and it's astonishing, I'm madly in love and it's like living in another dimension. I remember the night after the third time I saw VH in the cinema, I got home, I was gleeful, because it was dazzlingly marvellous, and at the same time I was about to collapse, I wasn't a blinded youngsters to believe that I could ever reach him, though I STILL CAN'T BELIEVE THAT LOVE WE ARE FEELING TOWARDS RICHARD IS UNREAL! I got drunk, I drank a couple of bottles of wine what I had never done before. And I was crying so hard I was impossible to endure. There was on thing that upset me most-I didn't know English at all. I couldn't neither read, nor, write, nor speak. And it was by far the toughest time when I chose the way. I knew precisely, if I hadn't changed anything, I would have died, and it's not a showing off. In the morning I made a decision-I quit my boring job which did nothing, buit killed me slowly and plunged into learning English. I took up English course and devote all my time to studing, waorking hard I made a tremendous success, and this is another conclusive proof HE IS A MIRACLE. You can think it's irrelevant, but he filled my life with sense and gave me such a high pleasure of the deepest emotions that, well, you'll think I'm crazy, perhaps, I am.)
I figured out that English's making me happy, now I've got a new job related to language and things are turning up. So, this admirable Australian guy saved me, and I will always know this life is not in vain, because he exists.
And I want to say, I'm deeply hurt he's already married.
That girl, Silvia, she's just bloody lucky, because I'm absolutely certain, he's not only the HANSOMEST AND SEXIEST AND HOTTEST GUY IN THE WORLD, he is also hilarious, kind and gentle. Some say nobody is perfect, I know the one who is! It's not envy already, I seem to run out of feelings, the news of their wedding was an awful impact, I thing it's a defensive reaction that I feel almost nothing when I think of the fact they are married. I think, I let myself to think of it thouroughly, I'd become mad indeed and get into asylum.
I want to say-I LOVE YOU. I DO LOVE YOU, more than words can say. There are so many of us, admirers who claim they do, so my voice can just be lost in that chorus of loving ones, but I can't help that.

Never knew, I could feel like this...
It's like I've nver knew the sky before.
Want to vanish inside your kiss,
Every day I'm loving you more and more...
Listen to my heart, can you hear it sings?
Come back to me and forget everyting!
Seasons may change winter to spring, but I love you till my dying day...
Come what may...

Beloved one, to lose you is to never love again.
Last year I was a completely different human. Thanks God, I met Richard! I've written tons of letters at almost all forums about RR I've come across on the net. About going mad... I've been mad, insane since I saw Richard as Dracula in Van Helsing. If God sometimes touches us to show there is something more than daily tedious life, it happened to me last May, when I saw Richard's fair face, I coudn't breathe, I was suffocating because such a beauty couldn't exist even in my imagination. The thing that amazes me most is that this love isn't fading, it's exactly the same as it was that first time, and I can't live, can't think, cause Richard has occupied my mind and, what is more, he has changed my life. Actually, last year I got into trouble, I thought I shouldn't live anymore, there was no a slight sense in my life, one day, in despair I went to the cinema having no idea it it's good or not. And fell in love with him after two seconds (enough to perceive an image for a human brain). Summing up, I saw Van Helsing 10 times in the cinema and an endless amount of times on video at home. I consider this as one of the best films ever-excellent cast crew, intriguing plot, divine Dracula, (in fact, the handsomest man in the world). I really can't get tired of watching this, and it's astonishing, I'm madly in love and it's like living in another dimension. I remember the night after the third time I saw VH in the cinema, I got home, I was gleeful, because it was dazzlingly marvellous, and at the same time I was about to collapse, I wasn't a blinded youngsters to believe that I could ever reach him, though I STILL CAN'T BELIEVE THAT LOVE WE ARE FEELING TOWARDS RICHARD IS UNREAL! I got drunk, I drank a couple of bottles of wine what I had never done before. And I was crying so hard I was impossible to endure. There was on thing that upset me most-I didn't know English at all. I couldn't neither read, nor, write, nor speak. And it was by far the toughest time when I chose the way. I knew precisely, if I hadn't changed anything, I would have died, and it's not a showing off. In the morning I made a decision-I quit my boring job which did nothing, buit killed me slowly and plunged into learning English. I took up English course and devote all my time to studing, waorking hard I made a tremendous success, and this is another conclusive proof HE IS A MIRACLE. You can think it's irrelevant, but he filled my life with sense and gave me such a high pleasure of the deepest emotions that, well, you'll think I'm crazy, perhaps, I am.)
I figured out that English's making me happy, now I've got a new job related to language and things are turning up. So, this admirable Australian guy saved me, and I will always know this life is not in vain, because he exists.
And I want to say, I'm deeply hurt he's already married.
That girl, Silvia, she's just bloody lucky, because I'm absolutely certain, he's not only the HANSOMEST AND SEXIEST AND HOTTEST GUY IN THE WORLD, he is also hilarious, kind and gentle. Some say nobody is perfect, I know the one who is! It's not envy already, I seem to run out of feelings, the news of their wedding was an awful impact, I thing it's a defensive reaction that I feel almost nothing when I think of the fact they are married. I think, I let myself to think of it thouroughly, I'd become mad indeed and get into asylum.
I want to say-I LOVE YOU. I DO LOVE YOU, more than words can say. There are so many of us, admirers who claim they do, so my voice can just be lost in that chorus of loving ones, but I can't help that.

Never knew, I could feel like this...
It's like I've nver knew the sky before.
Want to vanish inside your kiss,
Every day I'm loving you more and more...
Listen to my heart, can you hear it sings?
Come back to me and forget everyting!
Seasons may change winter to spring, but I love you till my dying day...
Come what may...

Beloved one, to lose you is to never love again.

Laura Brown